DO COOL SHIT WITH ME PACKAGES ARE NOW HERE!

EVER WANTED TO HANG OUT WIF MEH? WELL NOW HERE IS YOUR CHANCE! JUST LIKE GOOD OL' Josh Frees (drummer of bands like apc, nin, devo, the vandals, weezer so on and so forth) you too can now pay to hang out with me and do cool shit! THIS IS A LIMITED TIME OFFER SO SNAP SNAP BITCHES!

small packages: 

small package one: take me to chick fil a and i will re in-act the whole entire "unforgivable" sketch from youtube! Buyer must buy me a chicken sandwich and waffle fries and a coke FOR FREE! 

Price: $10.00 (unlimited amount of these packages for sale!)

small package two: Take me to chesterfield town center and I will take a sexy photo with you on one of the kiddy rides in the food court. Then you can buy me a bubble tea and we can have a sushi date at tokyo shogun! 

Price: $15.00 (unlimited amount of these packages for sale!)

small package 3: skype date with me and geno! you get to talk to us for 10 minutes and sing a song with us of your choice on webcam! 

Price: $15.00 (unlimited amount of these packages for sale!)

PACKAGE ONE: HANG OUT WITH ME AND DAVID FOUTZ (see below picture if you do not know who he is)  AT THE LOCAL MCDONALD'S FAST FOOD RESTAURANT OF YOUR CHOICE! UPON ARRIVAL WE WILL TAKE A PICTURE INSIDE OF THE BALL PIT (if there is one) AND EAT BIG MACS! (big macs will be provided by you at your expense of course!) THEN WE WILL RUN LAPS AROUND THE BUILDING WHILE SINGING THE BURGER KING SLOGAN "HAVE IT YOUR WAY" EXTRA 5 DOLLARS WILL GET YOU AUTOGRAPHS FROM BOTH ME AND THE FOUTZ! WE WILL SIGN YOUR MCDONALDS CUP! 

Package cost: $25.00 plus food $5 dollars extra for autographs! (number of packages for sale:1)

THE FOUTZ!

PACKAGE TWO: HANG OUT WITH ME ON A ONE ON ONE DATE AT THE BOWLING ALLEY NEAR MY HOUSE THAT I STILL DO NOT KNOW THE NAME OF! THIS PACKAGE IS GOOD FOR ONE BOWLING DATE WITH ME! WE WILL WEAR ROCKABILLY CLOTHES SO THAT WE LOOK LIKE WE BELONG IN THE JOINT AND PLAY ONE GAME OF BOWLING! THEN WE WILL CHALLENGE EACH OTHER IN A GAME OF MS. PACMAN! THE LOSER HAS TO BUY THE WINNER A LARGE SODA! THEN WE WILL GO OUT IN THE PARKING LOT AND HUG EACH OTHER ONE TIME AND THEN YOU GET TO DRIVE ME HOME WHILE WE LISTEN TO MASTER OF PUPPETS! 

Package Cost: $50.00 (#of packages for sale:2)

PACKAGE THREE :  MINI GOLD DATE! YOU GET TO TAKE ME TO THE MINI GOLF PLACE BY MY HOUSE AND PLAY TWO ROUNDS OF MINI GOLF WITH ME! THAT IS RIGHT... TWO ROUNDS! THEN I WILL CHALLENGE YOU TO A GAME OF MARVEL VS. CAPCOM AND THE WINNER HAS TO BUY THE LOSER AN ICE CREAM OF THEIR CHOICE! THEN WE WILL RACE EACH OTHER WHILE DRESSED AS MARIO KART CHARACTERS! AT THE END OF THE NIGHT I WILL GIVE YOU A HUG AND WE WILL DRIVE HOME WHILE LISTENING TO A SMASHING PUMPKINS ALBUM OF YOUR CHOCE!

Package Cost: $100.00 (buyer must pay for all games, food, and everything else!) (#number of packages for sale:1)

PACKAGE 4: SPEND THE WHOLE ENTIRE DAY WITH ME! (NOTE THIS CAN ONLY HAPPEN ON A SUNDAY) NOT MUCH TO SAY HERE.. JUST TAKE ME SOMEPLACE OF YOUR CHOICE AND SPEND THE WHOLE DAY THERE WITH ME! ANYWHERE IS FINE AS LONG AS IT IS SAFE AND CLEAN! ON THE WAY HOME I WILL GIVE YOU A HUG IN YOUR CAR AND WE WILL LISTEN TO THE DOPE SHOW ON LOOP UNTIL YOU TAKE ME HOME!

PACKAGE COST: $150.00! (you cover all activities that are to be done that day!)